The End of My 12 Weeks

I can't believe I'm doing this. I can't believe I'm doing this. I can't believe I'm doing this. But I said I would and I'm no liar.

Here is my Before Kristi Approved picture and my After Kristi Approved picture.

Just kidding.

*My Mom and husband have given me a hard time for not taking my "after" picture in the same swim suit I wore in my "before" picture. Wearing a swim suit this morning probably would have shown my results better and more positively but I was going running and I just wanted to do it while I had Go there.

Gah. I look at my before picture and cringe. Seriously cringe. I am not seeing a person completely comfortable with her body. I'm seeing someone who is in denial. And someone who is tired. And someone who is getting frustrated with the past 30 minutes she has been trying to help her daughter take an un-blurry picture, but can't seem to to save her life.

My first twelve weeks of the program have ended and I am 13 pounds lighter, 6 inches smaller around my waist and 4 inches smaller on my hips, though I have to say, where the book says to take your measurement each week isn't the place on my hips where I saw the most improvement (a couple of inches below that, I'd say (yes, those would be saddlebags) but I never did my measurements there) but that's ok. It's not the numbers that I was really aiming for anyway. What I do know is that I have my waist back, I'm less thick in weird places like my neck, back, armpits (ew!), and my pants are definitely looser. In fact, jeans that once were hard to button, I can actually just pull straight off my body without buttoning, which is a pretty good feeling. I'm more toned. I'm stronger. I feel better. To be honest, though, I'm a little disappointed in myself because I didn't do the entire 12 weeks perfectly. It was more like I did the first 8 weeks perfectly 100% and then did the last 4 weeks at 50%...or less at times. When I found out about Ruby's Celiac Disease, I suddenly had to focus on what she needed and how to cook for her and this new lifestyle for our family, so preparing my Kristi Approved meals went out the window. I tried to make good choices but I feel like if I would have done the next 4 weeks perfectly, I would have lost more but that's ok. You can only do so much, you know? I have the option of continuing, but I'm not going to. I feel like because of countless hours of nutrition classes for Ruby's Diabetes and now Celiac, I can do this on my own. It won't be as easy or straight forward on my own and my continued weight loss won't be as speedy but I'm trying not to get overwhelmed right now and so I'm just going to do the best I can with less structure and try my best to stay in control. I think what I loved must was that the program has changed my relationship with food, which needed to happen. If I can maintain this frame of mind where I'm not obsessing over food, anticipating when the next time I'm going to eat and what that will be and how that will impact my emotions, not to mention the constant overindulging, I'll be in good shape. Right now, I'm just focusing on cooking healthy food for my family. I'm feeding a Diabetic with Celiac Disease now and my #1 priority in the kitchen is to make her as healthy as possible.

Winning this Kristi Approved 12 week program was such a good thing, it kind of makes me teary eyed to think about it. I feel so much better compared to how I felt 12 weeks ago and more empowered. I couldn't have done it by myself. If you need a jumpstart, structure and an easy "THIS IS WHAT YOU NEED TO DO AND HOW YOU DO IT" step-by-steps, you should consider this program. I was never hungry. I LOVE the exercises. I loved how simple the meals are and thought most of them were tasty-tasty. During the 12 weeks, I missed cooking but like I said, I needed to change my relationship with food, and this did it. Now I can go and cook with a different perspective--what ingredients will be the best for my body but also taste the best rather than what am I craving right this second and if I ate that thing, it would make my mood so much better, wouldn't it and let's eat all of it right now like it's going out of style. I also loved lifting weights, which I had never really done before. I was a total cardio junkie but now I feel a little more well-rounded physically, so to speak. It was just the change I needed to make.

Anyway, Kristi Approved rocked. I highly recommend it.

"Houston, We Have a Clavicle" and Other Random Facts

-Yes, you heard it right here. I indeed have a clavicle. To be more precise, I have two. I thought I had lost them but I've found them again. I didn't know I was holding so much weight in my neck and shoulders. Sick. I've continued to lose weight (as of today, down 10 pounds and collectively, several inches around my waist and hips.) and have felt really, really good. Thank you, thank you Kristi Approved. I send you virtual hugs, kisses, high fives, firm handshakes, zurberts, nose honks, hair ruffles, go-get-em bum slaps, and maybe a goose or two. You should try their free seven-day challenge if you need to shed a few.

-Last night both of my brothers called me out of the blue. I just adore those boys. They are my people. We may live far away from each other and lead very different lives but when I hear their voices, I'm home.

-How good is The Bird and the Bee's cover of Hall & Oates' I Can't Go For That? Holy poo.


-We went strawberry picking as a family a couple of days ago. Pictures from that will be posted when I'm not so lazy and should be in the kitchen putting away at least frozen groceries which are thawing on my kitchen floor.

Today: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

The Good:
I lost 5 1/2 pounds last week. And that was while I was on my period, when I retain water like Sponge Bob Square Pants. (Gross! She just said "period!"...and "Sponge Bob Square Pants!") So far I'm loving this Kristi Approved Program--it's the first diet I've been on where I'm not hungry and I don't feel deprived and am loving the resistance training. Click here to read more about it if you're interested. Let me know if you want to do it with me, I'll set you up with great ladies at Kristi Approved. Oh, and my before pictures? I won't be posting those bad boys until I have something better to put next to it side by side. Especially "the back" view picture. Holy crap.

The Bad:
Olive is teething and was up a lot last night--I got about 4 hours of sleep. When I'm tired, I get clumsy. I was running out the door today to take Ruby to school after she was just seconds from missing the bus. Blast! I was going to go to the gym to teach my class straight from taking her to school. I had my blueberry protein shake in one hand and was putting Olive in her car seat with the other and ended up dumping my shake, sending it EVERY WHERE. My car (which, yay!, has very absorbent fabric upholstery) Olive's car seat, Olive and myself looked liked an Oompa Loompa just poked the bloated Violet Beauregarde with a pin. I didn't want to be late for my class so I took care of myself and Olive but left most of the mess to clean up afterward, which took over two hours out of my day scrubbing that purple gunk out.

The Ugly:
So I wipe Olive and myself off, change Olive's clothes, get to the gym and am dropping off the girls at the child care when a cute little girl runs up and points at me, shrieking "Ew! You're all mole-y!" I smile and say "It looks that way, huh? I actually splattered blueberry shake all over myself a couple of minutes ago." But then I looked down and realized that I had, in fact, done a really good job cleaning myself off and yes, ew!, I am just really mole-y.

Let's Talk About Weight, Ba-by

Do you remember this post?
My BeforeCruise/AfterCruise declaration?
Perhaps this image from it is still seared in your brain...

So I started at 143 B.C. and right A.C. was 146. Gee thanks, all day buffet!
Blehck.
I let a couple of weeks go by and got back down to my BC weight.
And then I won the Kristi Approved-Live the Life program.
And I was scared.
But excited.
I've been on it for 5 days now and things are going good.
How 'bout that?

Winning the Kristi Approved program couldn't have come at a better time. A couple of days before I left on the cruise, I was getting my class set up for spin, looking in the mirror and thinking "My body has way more potential than this. I wonder what it could do if I worked really hard..." and then my class started throwing their water bottles at me and were like "Stop looking in the mirror and work us out already."

I talked with the actual Kristi on the phone and she asked what I weighed when I started. 143. What did I weigh right now? 139.5. (That's 3.5 pounds down in 5 days!) and what my goal was: 125, even though I thought I was probably pushing it. I haven't weighed 125 since my wedding when I was eating nothing but cottage cheese and pineapple, which was a big no-no. But then Kristi was like "125? How tall are you?" 5'6". She was like "Oh girl, you'll totally be able to hit 120, no problem." 120? 120!!!! The last time I weighed 120, I was singing Sir Mix- A-Lot in the back of the bus on the way to 6th grade Outdoor Ed.

I said "But I'm a solid girl. I've got big, heavy bones. I don't think I could ever hit 120," but she assured me I would be able to if I did everything she told me to do--eat the meals and do the exercises, which haven't been bad at all. I'm excited to prove her right. I'm also excited to hear Sir Mix-A-Lot and not automatically picture myself in a pair of yoga pants.

Welp, it's been 5 days now and I've never wavered from the program once--even when my nice neighbor turned evil and put a plate of piping hot chocolate cake in my hands. Before, I would have put my kids to bed, turned a violent TV show on and eaten the entire thing by myself. But I've turned a new leaf. I'm motivated. Really motivated. I'm sick of feeling less than my best. I'm sick of feeling like a "big girl." I'm sick of needing to apologize after I post pictures of myself like this on my blog.

Sorry you had to see that again.

To keep me accountable, I'll track my progress on my blog. When Brandon comes home long enough for me to give him the camera and tell him which button to press, I'm going to have him take my BEFORE pictures. And then I'm going to (gulp) post them and post a new picture every two weeks or so. Without apologizing.